teaching a child with a disbility

When you have a child with a language based learning disability, at the beginning of every school, you are faced with your own anxiety stress and resulting nausea when summer ends and you know they are going to return to school. You dread getting ‘that’ teacher; the one who thinks they know how to teach your child, who they’ve never met. The one who is affronted and offended when you want to discuss your concerns and ensure certain things are noted. The one who in self righteous, self centered dismissal believes they are more than capable of teaching their class and your child, with no input from you as the parent.

When you hear disdain or condensation in their voice, it triggers you to want to commit violence upon them for being such an absolute idiot who has the potential, who has the right, to make your child’s life hell for the year. Their proximity and access means you are faced with an uphill battle as a parent when you have a teacher who acts childish. It’s happened to me so many times over my kids school career, that it feels like I have battle fatigue. I no longer have the stamina I once had to force and push my way through their barriers to create a path my child should have never been forced to navigate. It’s hard to garner enthusiasm or have hope that their needs will be met.

Instead of being politically correct and conciliatory, I want to go in swinging, ready for battle and to force his Individual Education Plan down their throat and make them choke on it, while I get in their face, spitting out at them inches from their purpling face, that they follow it or they’ll regret it. I am so sick of lazy teachers who make no effort to learn the needs of the kids in their care. I am so disgusted by people who treat teaching as a job instead of a privilege. Most teachers are used to parents who are lazy or who give up when faced with conflict within the school. They aren’t prepared for parents like me. I don’t care about you. My only concern is my child.

If you don’t wake up in the morning, bouncing in enthusiasm to get to the school and shape these malleable young minds, then you have no business being in the position. Teaching is a vocation NOT a profession. Children transfer their adoration of adults from parents onto teachers as they assume they know far more. Teachers are the first step in kids separating from parents and the responsibility they have to those kids is enormous. It is not just a school year for kids. Time is disproportionate for young people and every day is a week, every week is a year, every school year is a lifetime. It’s why summer lasts forever when you’re a child; 10 weeks of no school is infinity.

If being a teacher is ‘your job’ and you don’t take an interest in your students, that’s fine as long as it doesn’t impact my child. When it DOES, you are going to have a massive problem once a parent like me, discovers it. I don’t accept your diverting attention onto my responsibilities as a parent. You will be held accountable for your teaching method. I will require you to sit with me, the special education coordinator, my spouse and the vice principal and I want you to review your notes and accommodations for my child.

We will go through every test and you will account for every grade given. You will explain your teaching method and show me, on paper, how you accommodated and taught to my child’s needs. If you have the audacity to think that simply giving him extra time at the end of a test was adequate as a ‘teaching tool’ you are so wrong that it should scare you. That is simply a lazy way to explain that during the evaluation process you accepted he would take longer. It is not an explanation as to how you adjusted your teaching style to his needs so he actually learned the material being presented.

We both know that you did nothing all semester when it came to teaching him because his mark is your mark. We both know the grade you gave him was a reflection on the fact you ignored him and his needs, as opposed to his ability to perform on the subject matter. You haven’t seen his past marks in this subject always be in the mid to high 80’s. It’s his strong subject as he loves it. You don’t know that his work ethic is better than most adults I’ve met over a lifetime. You failed as a teacher. You took the easy way out by doing nothing to teach my child all semester and now you had better prepare yourself to be schooled by his mother.

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6 Responses to teaching a child with a disbility

  1. ismeisreallyme says:

    living this reality for the last 8 years with another 6 to go…*sigh*

  2. georgiakevin says:

    I am a special educator and i agree with your post! Personally parents like you, parents who care are my closest allies. The most difficult parents to deal with are the ones who either don’t care or who don’t know how to care. The parents who frustrate me are the ones who really don’t want their teachers to teach their children but to babysit until they turn 22. When you add far too many parents like this with school administrators who pay lip service to supporting your children and the teachers who teach them but really only care that that parents don’t complain to them.

    I care enough to have been parts of IEP teams for 18 years. I care enough to still work with my special students for 18 years even though I have been hit, scratched and kicked more times than I can remember, had 2 broken ribs, 2 broken teeth and a severely bruised shoulder. More and more is expected of good teachers and less is expected of everyone else. There are far too many good teachers retiring or leaving teaching before they reach retirement.

    There are lazy and bad teachers true but that is the responsibility of every IEP team to remove them. Sadly we are losing good teachers faster than bad teachers leave.

    • rougedmount says:

      ..and you can’t blame them for leaving because school administrators don’t support them; the government has dictated no personal responsibility on violent students citing ‘behavioral iep’s’ which give them permission to act however they want with no consequences. I agree,that useless parenting combined with the apathetic contribution of giving rights to a minority that abuses them, is a toxic combination to the staff involved and the kids who are forced to endure underfunded, under staffed classrooms where the bully student rules. i get SO frustrated. there is NO way I would have been able to handle the teaching environment, as much as i love education. i could not handle brutal parents and would find it impossible to be politically correct and lay the game.
      for me..kids come first..and our education and current social situation does not support it. i applaud your efforts, knowing intimately well the tole it takes on you personally.

    • Anonymous says:

      Dear georgiakevin:

      Institutions and processes of state forsake to their own destiny those they purport to rule. Like other public sector functions, education is dying. Or better, it is being executed. Our youths are made living sacrifices to the indolence and stupidity of those LEAST fit to rule. In this lordolatrous kakistocracy, those who want better have no recourse. Eventually, they forsake that social system. Then it is state repression and violence.

      I quit this system long so long years ago. In rougedmount’s words, I refused to ‘play the game.’ That said, I
      thank you for what you do. Many people do not thank you, but I do thank you. georgiakevin, thank you.

      Village Idiot

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