a mans tools and a husbands job

The light over the front door had been burned out for over a month and despite repeatedly asking my spouse to replace it, he hadn’t. As it was winter in the North, it was dark by 3:30pm and as I was coming up the front stairs to the house from a Doctors appointment, carrying a toddler and about 5 months pregnant. It had snowed lightly while we were out and I slipped and fell. I turned to protect the little ones and as a result, bruised up my side, my hip and elbow.

As I struggled to my feet with a crying baby in arms, my spouse rushed around the car as he heard my cry as I went down. I snarled at him as he went to help us up, to remove the light fixture and change the burned out bulb before coming inside the house. I was furious and in pain. I kicked off my snowy, wet boots, shrugged out of a heavy winter jacket, limping towards the sofa with both me and the baby crying.

I heard him come inside, heard him leave all while trying to calm down the baby, blow my nose and get a bottle of milk warmed up. After a few minutes of sitting in the arm chair, my spouse came back through the front door dragging a kitchen chair behind him. A chair with an ivory colored upholstered seat. A seat that now had dirty wet boot prints on it and that had obviously had the seat board broken; snapped from an adult man standing on it instead of a ladder, to replace the burned out light bulb.

Over the years, I have asked him to fix it, to replace the board. We fought about it, I asked for it to be a gift, I offered to barter services for it to be fixed. Eventually, I just put the small table and 2 chairs out into the garage as it simply wasn’t useable.

Eight years ago, I had a need to use the table and 2 chairs again and moved them up into the kitchen. The battle resumed over fixing the damn chair. Two weeks ago, I removed the seats from the chair, pulled out the staples and took the measurements. I have no desire to use power tools and frankly they scare me, and so last week, I approached the husband of a friend, who is a carpenter and had a garage full of plugged in things that make noise and leave a mess, as we were leaving a venue.

In front of a group of friends and our spouses on the way to the vehicles, I told him I had a little job for him, I asked him if he could help me, by cutting out my tracing of the seat bottom in the ¾ inch board I had purchased. Of course he agreed. As he glanced between my and my spouse he said, “Are you sure you need my help for this? Isn’t this something your husband should do?”

My reply was heavily laden with suggestive innuendo. “In an ideal world, my husband would be equipped with the appropriate sized tools to take care of everything I needed him to do; but it’s not and he can’t, which is why I have to ask other men to take care of jobs he’s not equipped to handle.”

Everyone roared with laughter and I continued looking straight ahead, not bothering to check my husbands reaction as everyone made their own raucous and inappropriate jokes about what I had said. “You’re still working with kids tools, buddy?” “Not enough weight in the hammer?” “The job needs a longer drill bit, does she?” “Too many curves for you to handle with too little equipment?” “The plastic toy sets are harder to use for certain jobs to get good results.”

So today, as I worked on a client file, I hear the unmistakable sound of a power tool out in the garage. Sure enough, he enters with a cut out base for my chair , using the miter saw I bought for him years ago. Twenty years of asking, begging, fighting and pleading got me nowhere. All it took was a well aimed remark to another man and in front of a crowd, that my husband wasn’t up to the task of doing jobs a wife needed to get done, in order to be satisfied.

Looks like he finally gave me some hard wood to work with.

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16 Responses to a mans tools and a husbands job

  1. Dawn D says:

    I am saddened that you need to resort to such ploys to get this done.
    I am hurting both for you and for him.
    But I am glad for the chair 😉

    • rougedmount says:

      i am taking a page from a blog i read (lovesmallpenis) and it’s truly been changing things with my spouse on a remarkable level. he is responding in ways he hasn’t in YEARS. it’s not always positive and it certainly doesn’t even lead to sex a majority of the time. i have gained such a different perspective than i had in the past and even though the marriage is not what i want or need, it’s functioning at a level i am still not used to. enough time has passed that i am becoming more and more confident that his need for a female led relationship combined with cuckold tendencies and even his madonna complex are all tied together in a very complicated package that he is unwilling to share with me. but that’s okay now. i don’t need or expect him to be the sole man in my life anymore. part of me still regrets he took that away from me as i would be happier with him alone if he met me half way…but i am learning to accept this reality. it’s not as bad as i imagined.

  2. B says:

    I almost spit out my beer reading this. Coming from a man, I know its sad that it had to come to this for you to get work done. Nothing hurts a man as a damaged ego or when his manhood has been made into a joke. I have had my wife start something that I had been asked to do before I got off my ass to get it done. Men will be men but good men will take care of their wives, girlfriends or both. I had to learn this early on and I hope your husband will too.

    • rougedmount says:

      my apologies for your disastrous beer spillage…lol.
      my spouse may or may not ‘get it’..but i am no longer worried about protecting his manly reputation. if he is embarrassed once he is found out, then he should be embarrassed when he does it..or in this case..doesn’t do it…and ‘it’ is a literal and figurative innuendo..lol

  3. Wendy says:

    Apparently public humiliation is the way to go.

  4. Wendy says:

    This sounds like my husband and I. In order to get any kind of reaction out of him, I’ve had to resort to humiliating him.

    • rougedmount says:

      i would NEVER have said something like that in the past. ive protected his little secrets and have not discussed our issues with others in real life. ive changed that since reading another blog and its definitely changed things a bit..not sure how it will actually develop but i am using it as a tool.

  5. dragonfly918 says:

    Oh kudos to you. This made me laugh out loud for real. So he’s the type that has to be humiliated… I guess the next step is making him watch while you get fucked by a well endowed man and get called names. He’ll probably love it.

  6. Dear rougedmount:

    Well shit…

    Is it possible that by producing this ‘hard wood,’ he’s sending you a ‘this is how you do it’ message?

    I wouldn’t have much believed the humiliation related stuff except that while vicariously exploring sexuality through the internet, I’ve met some [women and men] who truly are into it, including the ‘cuckold’ gig. No word of a lie. The combination of shame, arousal and a ‘rationale’ with a thread of logic [nothing perverted about MYlogic, right?] pulls some guys like moths to a flame. So yeah, having a small penis seems to do weird shit to some men’s brains.

    That said, I gather that some women find sex satisfactory only with people who have no penis at all. The fact of lesbian lovers might tell him that he can’t use his dinky as an excuse for not making your pleasure center switch on overload. ‘Raucous and inappropriate’ as your friends comments were, they do not to my thinking compare at all to the mocking indecency of leaving you emotionally heartbroken for the high crime of being and feeling like a woman.

    If you or he had a brother or friend who delivered a stinging back-handed slap to his face, it would be no less than he deserves. Where is his dignity? As it is, perhaps you will consider acquiring this tool for your beloved husband: http://tinyurl.com/pf2e4bv . Oh, and do tell us of any comments that may trickle in from the ladies…

    Village Idiot

    PS: Loved the innuendo and double entendre! Speaking of which, we know he has a miter saw. Did anyone have the presence of mind to ask if he could use a stud finder? He has a birthday coming up sometime … I dare you to get him one for his workshop. Better yet, you could get him the stud finder AND the toy in the link … Think of it as training. He gets his jollies ONLY when you do. And if nothing else, the threat of showing friends the box and key might make him handy around the house… After all, a man is a good as his tools.

    • rougedmount says:

      i gave him a stud finder years ago and it was promptly lost/misplaced. and unfortunately the little device you’ve indicated as wearable encouragement for his obedience is not applicable in my case…he has an exceptionally low sex drive and is not interested in my pleasure as he is not interested in his own…it’s rather complex as much as it is simple. Many couples have options in their sexual repertoire because they choose to communicate and THAT is the biggest failing of my marriage – we have none. I do have flashes of inspiration that result in a response from him, but they are far between and leaves me feeling like i am conducting a double blind study on what works. effort on top of exertion and it leaves me rather exhausted at times.

  7. LMAO!! If only this worked for all men 😉

  8. Chris says:

    A small tool may or may not fit the job, but a tool left unused, untried is the most useless, the most sad. I wish you had better.

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