I had forgotten about my standing offer from a potential sexual, surrogate partner. He messaged me this morning reminding me of our long friendship, his availability and his complete sincerity in what he is looking for and what he can provide. He has contacted me a few times since he came back into the country and I have politely kept him at arms length. But today was quite different. He was very upfront with me; no innuendo or flirting. It’s like waking up Christmas morning to a beautifully wrapped package under your tree, knowing that it contains exactly what you were looking for. You stand there admiring it and try to decide when the perfect moment would be to tear into it.
I have been reticent to accept his offers over the years. He doesn’t want a ‘relationship’ and I highly doubt he could maintain a conventional one anyway. His career is rocketing and it means that he has no time, at all, for the cultivation of romance and communication a woman would expect and require to make things work. His job puts him into the public spotlight almost daily. He garners lots of attention, not only for his looks but his athletic skill and for the people he has in his social circle.
This means that there are a very large number of groupies who offer their sexual favour to him on a daily basis in quite an aggressive manner. What they don’t understand is that this turns him off entirely. I have known him 4 years and I could care less about his ‘job’. My opinion of the man does not change simply because of what he does. My very lack of being impressed and simply being interested in him as a whole is why he has always liked me.
Plus I speak very plainly to him and I have never tried to suck up to him for what he does, like so very many other women do. It is my dominant and confidant nature that he likes. You can not compare me to the gym hard bodied, surgically enhanced women who go to extreme measures to promote their self image. They have killer bodies and for the most part have chosen to be childless. They do not see me as any sort of threat or competition, as I am far removed from what they look like.
Yet, he wants me and has for years. I am not competitive with him and I do not look at him as a social status elevator or meal ticket. I am sexual without being promiscuous. I am sensual and am very much a demanding giver. Because of what he does, this ability for me to be in control, relaxes him and removes all stress from him. I am a safe, warm haven in a sheltered bay of desires and he can allow himself to be manipulated and used for my self pleasuring purposes. No wonder he wants me, it sounds good even to me.
If I took emotionality out of the question, then it would make complete sense to use this mans body for what it’s begging for. He wants to be my sexual toy and plaything. He wants me to tease him and deny him. he wants me to get him hard again and again over the evening until his cock hurts from the constant engorgements. He wants me to be a cock teaser who eventually allows him the release of my body.
It would turn him on, knowing others could see this and wonder at what will happen between us. He wants me to ensure that his cock gets noticed as being hard inside his pants. He wants to watch me tease other men, flirt with them and have him watch and be turned on by it. He wants to have me tease him and walk away, seeming to choose someone else, leaving his cock hard and unable to get the release he craves. He wants the frustration and arousal it brings.
And then he wants me to fuck him; his glorious, thick, 9.5 inches of cut, man meat. He is a well hung cuckold who would submit to sharing me and having me get sexual gratification from other, well hung men as well. He would like his cock teased as he waited and watched me. I would have the power and make the decisions about our sexual relationship and his cock is merely a tool I use when and how I see fit.
It’s a tough offer to walk away from. And I am wondering why I have for so long. Dominant Sexual gratification, while not my priority, is still very much a way to at least have physical release. And I would be completely free to seek out the type of man who would be able to mentally fuck me. Or free to reintroduce one back into my life, if I choose to. After all, it seems that I make the sexual rules; as long as I overlook the fact that I still share a house with an impotent man who does not believe me when I tell him I need sex and am looking for it elsewhere and thinks that his refusal to talk about it, means continued abstinence on my part.