I have very, very tall children. So tall in fact, that people comment on their height all the time. Being singled our for ANYTHING, in their young adult, late teenager life brings on an enormous amount of stress, as they decide on how to handle the unwanted attention. One of my sons is finding it extremely difficult because he is even taller than the other two. Technically speaking, he is a little over the average height for a NBA basketball player, which is what I have told him to tell people who randomly say, “Wow, you’re tall” in his presence.
While at dinner this evening, we were talking about various comebacks he was going to have to arm himself with, to deflect unwanted attention with humor, when people make him feel self conscious about his height. One of the suggestions from a sibling was, “Well, from my vantage point you’re abnormally short”. Another was “Height isn’t the only place I have a big size”. The suggestions deteriorated from that point forward until finally a brother leaned over and said “Okay, if a cute girl says you’re tall, you can just tell her “” I’m not tall at all, if you’re on top””.
Everyone at our table burst our laughing in a semi crowded restaurant and struggled to get a hold of ourselves, as everyone covertly glanced our way in curiosity at what was possibly so amusing. It would have been hard to explain, considering the content of the conversation. I told him that his complaining about his height is pointless, as it is not going to change. Also, that a man complaining about how tall he is would be akin to complaining about how much money he had or how big his dick was, neither of which would garner any sympathy from anyone hearing the complaint.
His look was priceless, sort of reminiscent of “the angry cat” mixed with a high degree of barely restrained amusement. I said, please, it’s not like you aren’t going to use those comments sometime in the future with your friends.” To which he finally laughed and nodded his acquiescence to me and said “True, I totally will.” I love the fact they have learned how to use humor and sarcasm. They make me laugh with honest amusement at their quick minds and witty comments.