Rant: use it or shut up

~  DO   ~    NOT  ~    stand there and try to convince me of the lies you tell yourself.

You say we have sex ‘all the time’ but to YOU ‘all the time’ is every 2 months.   ~   Two months   ~    When I say to you “You realize the last time we had sex was 8 weeks ago”, you get pissy and deny the time frame and say “No, it wasn’t! We have sex ALL THE TIME!” I track when we have sex with an app – so don’t tell me I am unaware.

Don’t you  ~ dare ~ comment on my ‘mood’ because you created it by denying me a normal sexual life, so you can fucking live with my mood …besides, how can I be frustrated from lack of sex when according to your logic, we have sex ‘all the time’.

There is no ‘we’ in our sex life. In my mind, there is denial of clearly expressed needs on one side and extreme frustration interspersed with indifference on the other. And from his view, there is rampant and voracious sexual escapades and with random and unwarranted moodiness on the other.

God help me but I can’t do this anymore. I need a sex life and if he won’t step up to the plate then it’s time I accept one of the offers from a man willing to use his body to please mine. That or start drinking during the day and getting a prescription for an exceptionally strong anti depressant in hopes it chemically castrates my normal sex drive.

Vagina’s were meant to be penetrated and it’s time mine was. All he wants from me is my “normalized mood” and that comes with lack of sexual frustration and so my getting sexually satisfied from another man, is simply giving him the only thing he is looking for. Then he doesn’t have to worry about the effort needed to touch me.

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20 Responses to Rant: use it or shut up

  1. treyzguy says:

    Jeez! Holy Shit! You tell him girl!!! LMFAO!!!

  2. Ned's Blog says:

    You’ll notice I didn’t click the “like”button, not because I don’t appreciate what you’re saying and how you said it, but because I understand that feeling all too well from my previous marriage. Fifteen years of feeling like there was something wrong with me for wanting intimacy on all levels, from handholding to passionate lovemaking, tender to taking charge. Whatever you do, don’t resort to prescription drugs; those are temporary fixes for someone with a condition. Your sex drive isn’t a condition — it’s a gift to the right person. It needs to be unwrapped for more than just Christmas and birthdays.

    • rougedmount says:

      seriously…when you pile brutally dry, brush day after day, soak it in lighter fluid and then have the nerve to be playing with matches beside it, do not be surprised if a flash fire starts with a thunderous roar and burns your eyebrows off.
      i would never seriously consider drugs or drinking as a solution..but saying it is an option is rather scary…can you imagine choosing that over a 6 hour tryst in bed with someone whose entire focus is to pleasure you sexually?
      i am not asking the man to eat raw liver rolled in fly larvae for god’s sake. it has been so long since i was myself in bed that i am getting squirreley. i am starting to have erotic dreams again. i know once that happens i am going to start to losing focus in my daily life again, to the point that everything will suffer.
      i was not made to be celibate.
      i am glad that you found something that healed you and that you were in a place to have it grow into something beautiful. i look forward to that so very much…in the meantime? my frustration is starting to develop seething resentment when i am presented with ‘evidence’ of how sexual he thinks he is. the level of delusion is mind boggling.

  3. Michelle says:

    I know the feeling all too well. Every 2 months would be an improvement here.
    I want to scream when I hear the stereotype that men want it all the time.

  4. jayne says:

    His whole world would have to be redefined if he considered himself to be in the wrong or faulted in some way with you. He had to be chastised for being wrong as a child for him not to even consider that possibility. That would mean he is not who he believes he is. Maintaining his illusion of himself is so much easier and he knows how to do that. You’ll get what you want and may it be soon!

  5. dievca says:

    Whew! Let it out~

  6. ContactRida says:

    it is not healthy to go without sex. not healthy for the mind, body or soul. i think Aretha Franklin said it best, “R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Find out what it means to me…. sock it to me. sock it to me. sock it to me…” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FOUqQt3Kg0

  7. Ray says:

    Been there, done that. I left. Now in a LOVING relationship. Hang in there… chart your course. LOVE (and really great sex) is out there!

  8. There’s an APP for that? Good Lord, am I out of the loop! Good on you for owning your power and not being sucked into his lie.

    • rougedmount says:

      “womanlog” in the playstore.. password protected. free version tracks your period, ovulation, bmi,weight,symptoms, moods, medication AND sexual frequency. the paid version has a pregnancy feature as well as ability to forecast optimal time to get pregnant,

  9. Its funny that we just can’t take it when we need it, how we need it. I took in a lover to cover for a pathetic sex life with my wife. It was the best decision I made!!!! I get to pound, twist, turn, fuck and suck until I’m totally exhausted. The trick is to find someone in an identical position as you so neither of you want to leave the partner for the lover. -A

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