RANT: Facebook can’t handle this shit

I fucking hate you

You take everything good and twist it around until it’s ugly and ruined.

You are garbage

Disgusting and impotent

Good for nothing and not even man enough to be a shadow of what you might have been

You try to use my words against me

And pretend that I am the one who has issues

That you do everything

And you are the one who is being compromised

By inclusion of me in your life

You are a pathetic loser

Worthless and unwanted

Take your passive aggressive attitude

And go fuck yourself with it

Because I hate you

I fucking hate you

And when you die, do you think I will care?

You will be forgotten

No one will go to your grave because as your wife

I can make the decision to send you to for medical testing

Or have you thrown in a refuse pile

And that’s exactly what I will do

You won’t even get a funeral

I’ll take your ashes and throw them in the garbage dump

Or into the pit where they burn rotten and dead animals

Unless you grant me a divorce first

The only reason you won’t is because you are greedy

You won’t give me half of the money we have earned

I don’t deserve it, you say

You are the one who worked, you say

You are the one who gave up everything, you say

Lieslieslieslies

Everything that comes out of your piece of garbage mouth is a fucking lie

And when you get mad I hear the truth of what you hide

The feelings you really have towards me

And how you put up with me

So you don’t have to pay me when we divorce

You tell ME to leave so I won’t get anything

Fuck you

I am not leaving

Because you WILL pay one way or the other

And if you declare bankruptcy like you threaten

To avoid paying me alimony

Then I will get your pension you stupid fuck

You are the nightmare that every woman fears marrying

You have the fucking nerve to say MY moods swing?

Fuck off

You leave everything out and put nothing away

And so I tell you to pick it up and put it away

Because I am not doing it for you

And I don’t ask…I TELL you

Why should I fucking ASK you to clean up your own mess?

I state it in a clear no nonsense voice of a mother

PICK UP YOUR TOOL BOX AND PUT IT AWAY

Because I need to get into the deep freezer you have placed it in front of

SO I can start making spaghetti sauce for dinner

And you have a drill battery on top of it charging as well

Because that was near the last place you used it

And so you left it there

Like you do with everything you touch

Its why you have all your papers and stapler and cords and binders all stretched out

On top of the bar downstairs

Because your office is so full of junk and trash

Its unusable anymore

Its why your medication is on the shelf under the stairs and my canning supplies

Because it was a flat surface, I had cleared to reorganize my jars

Its why your tools are on top of my boxes of pictures on a shelf

Because it was flat and I hadn’t moved the lower boxes up yet

Its why you piled toothpaste and shampoo onto a book shelf

I had spent a day cleaning off so I could reorganize the current ones I kept

And just hadn’t gotten back to because of having to finish a separate project

Instead of putting it into the bathroom or the storage containers I have for that purpose

Its why there is toilet paper on the laundry room floor

As opposed to under the bathroom cabinets

Because you put nothing away

And I come behind you like a mother

Chasing a 16 month old toddler

Just learning to walk and grab everything in reach

And who gets into everything not put away

And you have been told 1000000 times that a mess stresses me out

It puts me on edge and upsets me

I need things in their place

I can handle a bit of a mess occasionally, especially when reorganizing

But I can not stand filth and leaving a mess behind on purpose

I can not stand dirty dished piled under and behind work desks

I can not stand garbage cans full and left un-emptied

Or dirty laundry and sour wet towels

Left piled to rot and mildew and ruin wood floors

It took me a month!! to clean up the mess you had made downstairs

Since the last time I did it last summer

3 out of 5 rooms cleaned down there before you got back

My momentum ground to a halt because I had other things to focus on

And I can’t touch your mess when you are around

Because when I do you freak out

Because like most hoarders

You go into a panic melt down

High anxiety when your things are touched

And you start to attack and flip out

So it has to be done when you are gone

You disgust me

Everything about you disgusts me

You aren’t a man, not even remotely comparable

To men I have seen and experienced in life or online

You are a failure at being a provider

You are a failure at maintaining a home

You are a failure at having a good relationship with your wife

You are a failure in bed as the worst lover imaginable

Unskilled and sloppy, awkward and limp dicked

Pathetic and useless you don’t bring pleasure

Because you don’t even attempt to try

You won’t take direction because you see it as criticism

You hurt me because you won’t listen to what I need

And then get mad that I am hurt and don’t want you to touch me

I fucking hate every single thing about you

But more than anything I hate your lies

lieslieslieslies

Every time you open your mouth you lie

And I hate the fact that you taught it to your sons

The fact that instead of being a role model for them

You taught them to deflect responsibility

And that while I still may be able to save the younger two

The oldest is lost because of his autism

And I hate you for that

I can never forgive you for that

For trying to gain camaraderie from your sons against me

And act like I am the crazy one

Because I am finally fighting back

And you don’t like it at all do you

You fucking cock sucker

At least my gay friends admit what turns them on

As opposed to you, who can’t get hard

Even with me sucking your cock

It’s because you are gay, you moron

You cheat on me with MEN you stupid asshole

And then get mad at me when I get sexually frustrated

Because you can’t perform in bed with me

How about a BIG FUCK YOU because I am so done with this

It never ends it goes on forever and nothing will improve things

I am sick of writing about it

Sick of thinking about it

Sick of living it

Sick of living in a house with carpets half torn up

Holes in the ceiling from water damage from 18 months ago

Piles of wood flooring bought but never installed

Because you didn’t have tiiiiiiiime

With garbage piled up until I remove it

Sick of telling the kids to mow the lawn

Or to put away a mess you have made

Sick of every single thing about you and your stupid family

I fucking hate all of you

And I know its not the answer or the solution

But I tossing back my Deseronno on ice serves as both

Right now

Because I am so fucking mad I could disembowel you

With a garden rake just for fun

 

You are so fucking lucky you don’t know him

And I am sorry if you know anyone LIKE him

Soul sucking miserable fuck up

Who makes you feel crazy and worthless

All in the span of 20 seconds

 

What makes it worse is I let him get to me…I fucking reacted!

And I could send this to him

And re-write it to remove all my anger

And make it seem conciliatory

And try to protect his male ego

And apologize for reacting

And take the fucking blame

And ask him to forgive me

And say I will try harder next time

And he would grudgingly say I over reacted

That this time he will let it pass

And act like all the lies I just said were true

Because to him they ARE

He fucking believes all the shit that it’s MY fault

And that pisses me off the most

Because he is so fucking self absorbed and unaware of all he does to create drama

Because he is a Passive Aggressive ASSHOLE

Who has never once in his entire life accepted responsibility for his actions

Fuck I hate him

Him and his lieslieslieslies

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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19 Responses to RANT: Facebook can’t handle this shit

  1. njuri says:

    Yikes! I’m glad I don’t live where you live. Here in Arizona everything gained after the marriage is split 50/50 and you don’t need to have a reason to get divorced. It’s a no fault divorce state so infidelity doesn’t matter. And, 60 days to 3 months later you are divorced unless there’s small children.

  2. tispersonal says:

    I might normally send virtual kisses and hugs when i come across a post that i can sympathize with. however in this case and if this were me, i’d be like don’t fucking touch me right now. i’d be way to spun up for conciliatory affections. so instead i’m sending you a virtual punching bag and baseball bat, when the bag breaks i have a golf club waiting in the wings for you as well. that is what i would want at this moment anyway. that being said, afterwards i’d want to sink into welcoming arms of strength that can help hold me up while I regain my strength. so know you have a friend out here with arms wide open.

  3. secondchance262 says:

    I knew someone similar to your husband, and that person was me. While I didn’t lie I didn’t tell the complete truth. Specially when it came to my feelings. I didn’t show affection, respect, love and I didn’t do anything, leaving everything up to my wife. I only know how you feel by what I have read and I don’t wish it upon anyone. As someone who has put someone else in your shoes I very sorry for what you are going through. You deserve more, you deserve attention and respect but most of all you deserve love. You are a strong person and wish all the best for you.

  4. Hahahahahah! Wow babes, that is a mofo rantness. holy columbo.

  5. mala says:

    I was engaged to someone with similar qualities. I can remember being filled with rage every single day. I don’t understand why you would only get 1/2 if he agreed to a divorce? Why can’t you file and still get it? 😦

  6. Ray says:

    Damn! I thought MY letter to my STBX was filled with hate (and passion), but DAMN….. you put ME to shame! 🙂 I’m not making light of this at all. I share many of the same feelings you do toward my STBX. I do hope this was therapeutic to get out….

  7. A Good Wife says:

    I think you need to talk with an attorney ASAP to figure out how you can leave him and get spousal support. This is clearly not a healthy relationship for you. Not just emotionally unhealthy but physically and mentally.

  8. Wow, if I had stayed with hubby I KNOW I would very likely be writing this very post myself a few years down the line. I admire your strength and your dedication to remain sane, stable and positive in this very difficult situation. I know it’s not easy! Most of all, I have immense respect for you for so openly sharing your anger and frustration with the world.

  9. JMC813 says:

    Hatred spewed from the fiery mouth of hell. So glad writing is such a perfect therapeutic outlet. Full of emotion and release. Without release I fear we would all explode under the building pressure of all our feelings. Glad you are working on an escape plan. I wish you all the best and hope you find the happiness you deserve.

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