I have stopped and started 100 different ideas, unable to finish any as my mind is fragmented and unable to organize. I feel disjointed and sad. Unbearably morose with no single event to trigger it, just a deep sorrow that makes the subtle veil of depression seems like a well worn and favoured shirt. I know it is simply the weight of my clenching uterus that is pulling me down into an exhausted and anemic lethargy and so it should pass by with time and sleep .
Laughter does not reach my eyes and I wonder at my ability to be present inside of my own heart anymore. Simple pleasures while acknowledged are not felt and I feel like I have disassociated myself from the things that made me happy. It was a casualty to the protective barrier I surrounded myself with against being hurt. Emotionally drained and physically exhausted, I am devoting the remainder of my day to the simple joy of napping on the sofa while enjoying the clash of my favourite teams on TV with a well loved heating pad