F- in parenting

i did not win any parenting awards today

as a matter of fact

i do believe i was a complete and utter failure

as a mother and as a person

even if everything i said was true

they didn’t deserve to hear it

sometimes, things are better left unsaid

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16 Responses to F- in parenting

  1. Frank says:

    Sometimes things cannot be left unsaid –
    damn the consequences…

    If people got what they deserved, the world would be a very different place.

  2. LindaGHill says:

    It happens to the best of us. Try not to kick yourself too hard for it … tomorrow will be a better day.

  3. Rincewind says:

    Maybe judging yourself to hard… god knows I didn’t love my parents all the time when I was a kid but honestly who did?

  4. tispersonal says:

    whats done is done. don’t beat yourself up to bad. although i have to admit some curiosity as to what the reaction was to your truth telling? i’m often curios as to what my children and husbands reaction would be if I were to completely unleash on them.

    • rougedmount says:

      hurtful words are internalized and become the voice a child hears when they attempt things in their future. i am ashamed that i could not control my outburst. i was the adult and failed to act that way. i will apologize to my son and tell him i am sorry and i will tell him i will try harder in the future. as to my spouse? he can fuck off.

  5. tispersonal says:

    and that’s what makes you a great MOM! when a parent can admit to their kids a short-coming, failure, mistake, that they were wrong, whatever it may be, then it teaches them that we are ourselves only human and that there is no shame in admitting to being something less than perfect. hopefully it teaches them that whenever they make a mistake in the future that they need to own it.

    • rougedmount says:

      that is the hope…unfortunately with this child, that will never happen. he has autism and occasionally i forget that no matter how much i parent and teach, he has limitations. and that makes me so infinitely sad that it breaks my heart. his lack affects me and not him. he does not realize how emotional i am right now. to him, emotions play no part in his life in the same way we interpret them. how i feel is irrelevant and unimportant in HIS world. my apology will mean nothing, my tears mean nothing. he might even ask if this is one of those times when he should act like he cares and i will remind him that he should not vocalize the thought that his pretense at feeling should be an act instead of a genuine feeling. sometimes i do not have the strength to be his mother and be married to his father at the same time.

  6. You saw that this was coming… You need to forgive yourself…. It sounds like your son was probably over it immediately after you said whatever you said… Regardless of his handicap, you still have feelings. It’s okay to express them when you’re overwhelmed.

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